Here’s one thing which no one tells you about parent-child relationship problems!
“THEY DON’T START WHEN YOUR CHILD STEPS INTO A TEENAGE” as most parents think.
Majority parents believe that a teenage is the starting point of all parent-child relationship problems. Because that’s when the signs of these problems begin to show; signs like lack of respect for the parents, back talking, etc.
However, there are many subtle yet significant signs that indicate towards the problems between parents and child even at an early age.
So, what these signs are? And can you deal with them?
The good news is parent-child relationship problems aren’t as hard as they seem. Therefore, in this post, I attempt to give you some easy-to-follow tips to tackle these problems.
But, before the tips, you need to know something very important.
Why are Parent-child Relationships Important?
As per the parent-child relationship definition, it is a unique bond shared and enjoyed by every parent with his/her child. It’s a bond which comes first in a person’s life and never leaves.
But, how do you know whether you share a healthy relationship with your child?
So, now you know:
- If your child cries or gets anxious in your company
- He avoids spending time with you
- He doesn’t listen to your firm instructions
- Doesn’t share his feelings with you or tells a lie frequently
- Talks back to you
- Is reluctant to invite his friends at home
……you don’t share a healthy and positive parent-child relationship.
And you need not wait for your child to grow into a teenager to pay attention to these signs! These signs of unhealthy relationship are apparent very early, only if you pay attention to them.
However, it’s never too late to take an action!
Once you have identified your parent-child relationship problems, it’s time to work upon and defeat them.
How to deal with Parent-child relationship problems?
- Say no to gadgets – Gadgets can spoil your parent-child relationship because when you spend more time on phones, tablets, and television, you miss out on an opportunity to build a strong bond with your child. So, keep away all your gadgets when with the kids. Give kids your undivided attention.
- Spend quality time together – The fast-paced life of today leaves no time for you to spend with your kids even though you feel guilty about it. But don’t worry! These tips on spending quality time with kids will help you overcome your guilt. Listen to your child actively; what he feels, what he thinks, his problems etc. and guide him to solve the same.
- Show trust and respect to gain the same – As we say, what you give, will return back to you. So, if you trust your child and talk to him with respect, he will automatically trust you and show respect.
- Watch your words – Words have the power. They can either enlighten, elate and make others feel wonderful or can demoralise them. So, be careful of your words while you talk to your child. Bad words will not only make the child turn away from you, but he will also pick up your language and use it in his social groups.
- Think positive about the child – Have you heard about the Universe’s LAW OF ATTRACTION? It says that all your thoughts are eventually transformed into reality. Whatever you focus on, positive or negative, it will be transformed into reality. So, when you focus on the weaknesses or the negative traits of your child, you are actually fuelling them further. Focus on his positive traits instead.
- Be compassionate – When your child commits a mistake, knowingly or unknowingly, show your compassion towards him. He is in pain because of his mistake. And now, it’s your duty to understand him and raise him above his guilt feeling rather than blaming and shouting at him.
- Don’t compare your child with others – Whether in sports, studies or any other activity, comparing two children is always a child abuse. Comparison harms your child’s developing self-esteem and confidence. Refrain from any kind of comparison. Accept your child the way he is.
- Model your bad behaviour – Watch your behaviour with your spouse, friends, and relatives. Your kid’s eyes are always watching you. So, if you have behaved badly at any moment with anyone, rectify it as soon as possible to avoid a bad impression on your child’s mind.
- Don’t complain to your friends – Taking help from other parents to deal with your child’s problems is OK. But, never lament and complain about your child’s behaviour to your friends.
- Always encourage the child – Be it a success at potty training or the first drawing of your child, such small achievements matter a lot to your child. So, always be a source of encouragement for them by praising their achievements. Never criticize them for their failures; be their support to accept failure with grace and move on.
Today, we see two extreme types of parenting. One, where the parents don’t have time to spend with their kids and they make up for the loss by giving in to all the child’s demands (Yes, that’s pampering in the real sense). They never scold or say anything to the child.
The other, where the parents are too strict and domineering that they don’t pay regards to the child’s opinions. They just expect him to do what they want and if he doesn’t they criticize him.
However, both these styles of parenting are the root cause of all parent-child relationship problems.
TAKE AWAY MESSAGE:
So, now it’s up to you how you apply these tips to nurture a strong parent-child relationship.
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If you want to share your parent-child relationship problems or any tips to deal with them, we welcome your suggestions in the comments below!